Craziness

Some days I wonder if I'm ever going to have it all together. The past 2 weeks have been.....well insane. A teenie tiny part of me thinks if I wasn't breastfeeding Sophia maybe things would be a bit easier. I just can't seem to get a thing done around here but there's no way I'm quitting. Not after Mia had RSV last winter.

My house is really depressing me. I can't get it clean, I think it looks pretty bad! Dave is always so nice about it though. He never says a word about it but he's seen some horrible houses in his time doing pest control. It's just one mess after another. If I cleaned every second of the day, I might have a clean house next week. Seriously. If I took this laptop and gave it to someone reading this and said "keep this so I stay off the dang thing." It still wouldn't be a one day job. Now maybe just maybe if someone took the kids, it would be but that's a very RARE occasion. I think it's just the interuption part from the kids that makes it so darn hard. I want a spotless house and kids that would leave their toys in the bedroom rather than drag them in the front room! It's going to take me cleaning non stop to ever get that.

Maybe it's just I'm too hard on myself. I've tried lowering my standards and priorities on what's important in a day but it's not helping. I am not online as much as I used to be because its impossible. I pop on throughout the day when things aren't going on for 10 minutes here 5 minutes there. I never watch TV except at night with daddy after the kids go to bed. I am so tired when it comes to bedtime, I'm asleep in about 2-3 minutes after I put my head on the pillow. I think I even LOOK exhausted. Everytime I breastfeed I nod off. lol

I have a feeling the house and exhaustion are just going to get worse over this month. We have a zillion appointments coming up including Dominic's surgery on the 29th. If anyone can give me advice on what to expect with a tonsil/adnoid removal I'd appreciate it! Dominic peed the bed twice in the past week after we put him on the toilet at 10:30 and once when daddy was at the toilet trying to pull down his pants he peed on daddy, himself and the floor. With that and his excessively loud snoring, we decided to go ahead and do this.