Thursday, August 02, 2007


With the loss of sweet Hannah, I feel awful when I post any bit of a pity party on my behalf. There are much more important things in life then what I have to deal with. Getting Rachel and Jess through the days with my small blogger comments has become a priority to me. Although I can never imagine the loss of a child at 5 years, I can say that I experienced a great deal of grief after the loss of our baby when I was 12 weeks pregnant. For someone to never endure something like that and then have it happen is a story itself. Here you are completely ignorant to the fact that things like that happen, you are at the 12 week mark and are safe, etc and then just like that its over. I am so happy that the frogs bring some calm and hope to her and the family. Every frog I see now reminds me of a beautiful little girl. With our loss, March of Dimes sent me a grief package and on it, it says "There is an ancient belief that each entrance of a child into heaven is marked by a falling star....." Around the time we lost the baby according to the sonogram, driving we saw a falling star and it was amazing! We were on our way to the hospital to see my best friend's new little one. We went in the hospital telling Jennifer all about it even Dave was really excited telling her about how it fell! Little did we know that was probably our falling star. But the magic of it all is that we now know that our little one is in heaven, the star was a "sign" and it brings us great comfort. I'm glad the frogs do the same for them.

On to my pity party, while Laura is dealing with daycare woes, I am having the same problem but preschool. Instead of beating my head against the wall, I choose to vent here, that way the kids won't think I'm crazy. We have been waiting all summer for any sign that Dominic will be accepted into the preschool at Alex's Elementary School. He is on an IEP (individualized Education Plan) which is short words means he needs help and the state will pay for his schooling and extra help. Because of his IEP, the school has to accommodate him, he automatically qualifies for a spot. This is great because it will prevent me from going to 2 different schools and I can do room parties or even just visit one school instead of 2. Well it's now August and they still have not given me the smallest glimpse that he is definitely in and what time, nothing. They went through a change of management and it sounds like the person before was guaranteeing spots before they were supposed to. They have no idea if he's going to be in or not. They are saying if not, he could go to the other Pre K program at the other grade school in the district which is in another town but all Highway so not that far away. The bus will come get him and everything. Well while he already has a spot at his Early Intervention school he's went to 2 years, I told them that he may be going to Alex's school but now WHO KNOWS!! It's just getting aggravating because I'm feeling pressure that I need to tell his current school what's going on and I myself have no idea. I chatted with the Head Start teacher who runs the program at Alex's school and she is going to try to find him a spot because even though Head Start is income based, they also accept kids at-risk with an IEP.

Damien's schooling this year will be here at home with a SP (Speech Pathologist) and then next year he will go to Dominic's current school on an IEP. Can my children's education be more confusing??

My interview went rather well with Aubrey's parents. I stressed that once I started, I have no plans to quit again. I also tried to find out if the drive was ok since we are in the country but they didn't seem like they cared. I've only lost one daycare kiddo due to the drive and he actually came here for over a year. So we just wait and see. I hope they choose me out of the 2 providers they are looking at but if not, it won't make me too terribly sad. :)

1 comment:

Jess T said...

I'm sorry. Miscarriage is difficult. We've had the unfortunate experience and can totally understand.

I hope things with the school get worked out soon so that you can put your mind at ease.