Wednesday, June 18, 2008

My Mother's Outlook

I had a few lovely conversations with my mom about my niece ordeal. My mother and sister are 2 peas in a pod so I knew she'd probably be in a tizzy over the whole thing. Last night she tells me that she knew this was a bad idea and she should have left them at the center they were at. I told her I was trying to help J because she's broke and complained how much they were going to charge her during the summer so I offered to help. She tried to make it sound like at first that I am a threat to K and she didn't like to be bossed around. I told my mom that one day when she was coming to pick up K and M for my sister that K started saying "I don't want to go with that grandma, I don't like her." So she must not like her rules either. lol She didn't care to hear that. ;) According to my mom K is an angel at her house, she never has problems. Whatever. Everytime K and M are over there I hear her yelling at them about this that and the other. So when I could hear K in the background at her house making my mom mad she wanted to quickly get off the phone and put them in bed because they were "tired"..... she could tell.

She calls me back this morning at 7:30 am. Apparently when my mom tried putting the kids to bed at 9 (mine had already been in bed for 1 hr) it didn't work and they wanted to go home. I believe they were just missing their mom since all K said was how much she missed her mommy when she was here all day. Her sister M had said, "we don't get to see her till tomorrow!" So that sounds like missing mom to me. Anyways- Finally at 11 pm she took them home when my sister got home from school. She said she expressed to them how mad and hurt she was that they weren't going to stay over which out of my mom would be screaming (lol) and that they weren't going to stay the night ever again. Nice eh? Sounds like she has a handle on them well right?

So she tells me that she hopes I'll reconsider and watch them all summer long. I told her I would watch M but not K. So here's a list of what she tells me. PS: she has never watched all 4 of mine or all 6 grandkids EVER. This post is basically an FYI for me to go back and read so I can remember how horrible she really is sometimes.

1) I don't do anything with the kids and if I did puzzles and games, interacting with them that they would probably act better.- sure i don't do puzzles and games with them. They are 5 and 8 yrs old! I get out things for them to do and they do them together! I'm sure Alex really wants me on the floor playing Polly Pocket! I do play with Mia and Damien though especially outside when they need alot of guidance. Mia and Damien are always by my side helping play clean or drawing when we're in the kitchen or we play with puzzles, books, toys in the front room.

2) I don't have the patience for daycare.-advice from a mom who ran her own daycare and screamed at them and us all through our childhood.

3) If I didn't have so many kids maybe I could do daycare better.- Mia is the only one I've added since I quit doing daycare and I had 6-8 kids on a normal basis before Mia with no behavioral issues with any of those children.

I'm just going to ignore it (Dave of course is dying to lay into her) I felt like crying by the time we got off the phone though. She is just evil.


Colleen said...

You tried to do a nice thing, it didn't work out. We have to make it ok in this world for things not to work out. My fit with the Mom's Club didn't work out. Jason in Iraq, not working out. Managing sister's crazy kids, not working out. I give you permission to say no, because you need to say no once in a while. Now remind me to say no next time you see me going crazy :)

Crystal said...

Family sometimes makes me crazy! Stay strong sister!

Angela said...

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I sure hope you can figure something out, otherwise it could be a very long summer for and the kids.

Kristi Ann said...


Family are the best at driving you crazy! Want mine? LOL

Jenn said...

I agree with Colleen, you have to say no sometimes.

I think Grandma should take K for the rest of the summer and see how she handles it. Don't you just love it when family is the opposite of helpful and supportive? Grrr!

I hope you can work things out amicably with your Mom and sister.

Valarie said...

Ohhhh, yeah. Moms always think they know best, even when they are trying to mother another mother. Don't feel bad about saying no.

kbreints said...

Oh my goodness - I am sorry for her makin gyou feel so bad! Your kids need to come first, if they are not liking the other kids around for whatever reason they need to go-- I don't think it has anything to do with you being able to handle it.